The People Who Cannot Swear
Believe it or not, there are people in the world who are incapable of swearing. I wonder why.
I love a good swear. Used in the right way, a swear word is a sweet explosion on the tongue. I have been known to utter certain words. A word that rhymes with suck. A word that rhymes with stick. And a word that almost rhymes with Horlicks.
Those Who Can’t Swear
But I have encountered a species of person who never swears. These people say words like Jeepers, Golly and By Jiminy.
I wonder if these people are full of suppressed rage. But I suspect they simply cannot swear. Their hearts are too pure, and the swear words melt away in the face of that purity. To swear, you need a certain amount of bitterness in your heart.
Reinventing The Lord’s Name
Irish people love a good swear, including what Christians call ‘taking the Lord’s name in vain.’ We don’t even regard that as swearing, though technically it is, if you follow the rules of Christianity.
Americans, meanwhile, are known for not swearing, and in particular, not taking the Lord’s name in vain. They’ve found inventive ways around that stricture though, leading to colourful phrases like Crimony Jillikers, Jesum Crow and Dangnabit. And the cry of the California Valley Girl: Oh my Gosh!
Photo Description: In white writing on a purple background, you see the letter F and then three asterisks, the clean version of a swear word.
Now that I have many nieces and nephews, there are now little ears nearby, soaking up the odd swear that falls from my lips. This has forced me to be more inventive in my swearing.
I’m fond of a good frick. And I flatter myself I can get away with feck. That barely qualifies as a swear word.
Give Swearing A Makeover
I believe swearing has a place within the rich tapestry of the English language, but it needs to be used wisely, in carefully chosen context. And I do reckon swearing needs a bit of a makeover.
We need to invent new and more colourful swear words. These words could work just as well as the traditional ones - honest to Giblets!
Golden! Thanks for that.
I'm reminded of this scene from Father Ted. https://youtu.be/XLTnacYvvg4?si=Fyqvlx_5Ym7MHvf4